My dad's graduation was 36 years ago

Mama and papa chow are in town for my graduation.

They requested for a Thai lunch and enjoyed the Korean dinner very much. It's time to show them some lovely cafe food and good coffee that I love so much in Melbourne. I also arranged an Italian dinner tomorrow, probably giving them a culture shock.

I'm guessing they will enjoy the Vietnamese Pho too, and definitely the Peking duck.

This is the beauty of the food scene in Melbourne, a lot of varieties, incredibly global.

I know it's not a pleasant thing to say but they just arrived today and I already felt suffocated. My rationale is that I'm used to being with myself, dealing with friends who are equally "localized", while my parents are intrigued by everything, constantly requiring explanations for why things are different than what they're used to in Malaysia. Even the most normal things to us, could have been foreign to them. Given the fact that so many things had happened since the last time they were here, there are a lot to fill them in with, to keep them up to date with the present. There's so much to share and so much to tell, so many things to clarify!

*Gasps*

Their first trip back in 2006. It's a little horrifying when you think about how time flies.

Anyway, I was supposed to stay the night with them at the hotel but decided to just come home to be in my own space. I think I needed to be away from them for one night, to deal with the reality that, they are here to get to know what kind of environment I live in, to meet my friends, to share my life. And, they are not here to judge me, to judge how I live my life. Never.

It helps to put things in perspective when I told my friend about this and she shared her similar experience when her parents were here. It made me realized that, it's not just me and I shouldn't be angry at myself for being agitated at my parents. What I need to do is to not try to change them or change how they should see things but try to change the way I interact with them. Most importantly, she reminded me that, metta to the parents, is the highest kind of karma.

Then, I sent a text to my dad to apologize for being short fuse but he told me that, there's no apology needed because they would never keep anything negative at heart, instead, he updated me that my mum was happily eating Korean fried chicken in bed as supper. And that text was sent at 12.30am -_- Suddenly, it occurred to me that, my parents are such understanding and loving people. I could have told them that I'm pregnant and they would still accept me for who I am, embrace me with open heart. I believe this is what Ajahn Brahm has been preaching about, the unconditional love.

As I'm typing this, tears are already streaming down my face.

Note to self:

There's no need for the constant pressure and self-induced stress of proving myself to them because in their hearts, I'm already good enough, in fact, I am the best daughter they could ever have.

PS:

I guess it also makes sense that, they would want to give me the best of everything, within their capability of course.

My dad is no Richard Branson and I would never expect him to be.

PPS:

I'm ready for graduation.

And to have failures thrown at me as I march fearlessly into next phase of life.